Probably quite a few clubs about whom these events are told.

But I heard it from a Sunderland fan.

The child had been removed from a violent mother under an emergency order and was before the judge for a decision as to where he should live.

The judge proposed the father. No! said the child, he beats me even harder!

'Your grandparents? 'No! no! no! they are the most violent of the lot!'

Each time a suggestion, and the child tells worst horrors and gets more alarmed.

The Judge in despair 'Who do you think should have custody? Where will you feel safe?'

The child: 'Sunderland Football Club'.

'Now that is an unusual suggestion, why is that?'

'They are not capable of beating anyone'